In The Meditator's Dilemma, Bill Morgan notes that many Westerners struggle with developing a regular meditation practice. He points out that the Buddha taught meditation to rural, nonliterate people 2,600 years ago. Two characteristics of most people in the US that weren't true in the Buddha's time are our very busy minds and the tendency to be hard on ourselves when we struggle.
One of my teachers said that when he was a new monk, his teacher came into the room and said, "go make yourself happy and then come back and meditate." His point was that the goal of meditation is not to get happy but to gain wisdom. His teacher said we need to bring a happy and uplifted heart to our meditation.
Bill addresses this directly in his book. He states what should be obvious: that meditation can and should be something that people look forward to and enjoy as opposed to taking cod liver oil: it doesn't taste good but it's good for you. He has developed many practices, which I have modified, that people can do at the beginning of a meditation session that bring a sense of quiet joy and can help the mind to settle and calm down.
You might play with these and see if one suits you best. Feel free to modify any of them. You could make any of them a voice memo on your cell phone, with pauses between each step, so it becomes a guided meditation. Each of these exercises can take as long as you like, even the whole meditation period if you are distressed or restless.
Calming
1. Taking a minute or so to ease into the meditation by focusing on the body and the breath.
2. Then imagining you are sitting in a warm and comforting bath. Can you feel the tensions in different parts of your body dissolving?
3. As you exhale, letting go of tensions and outside matters to the extent that you can. Don't suppress them or push them away, but rather keep bringing your attention back to the pleasant sensations of the bath.
4. Take your time.
Delight
1. Allowing a memory of a happy moment to arise, one in which you were filled with delight and the energy that brings.
2. Letting the memory wash over your whole body, heart, and mind.
3. As the sense of delight strengthens, letting go of the imagery. Simply enjoying the sitting and breathing in this atmosphere of playful ease and relaxation that has been created. If tension creeps in or the mind gets carried off, simply return again to the flow of imagery of this uplifting scene.
Arousing Gratitude
1. Settling into the meditation space, consciously relaxing the body and simply breathing.
2. Allowing a memory of gratitude to come into your heart and mind. It could be one far in the past or recent.
3. As images of this scene unfold, encouraging the feelings of appreciation and gratitude to bloom.
4. If the feeling of gratitude fluctuates, see what happens when you are totally interested and absorbed in the memory versus when you start to think about the situation and what it means.
5. Letting go of all thoughts and images and breathe as if you were grateful for the miracle of breath.
Arousing Wonder
1. Taking a few minutes to let the body and mind settle a bit, focusing on your anchor meditation, which could be breath, body, sounds, an image, or the loving-kindness phrases, etc.
2. Bringing to mind a time when you felt a sense of amazement or wonder, deeply moved by the magnitude or mystery of life. This could be from nature like watching a sunset or the night sky or seeing a butterfly, or it could be human creations--a piece of art or music, magnificent architecture like a cathedral or the pyramids, etc.
3. Allowing the feeling of wonder to grow stronger and spread throughout the body, heart, and mind.
4. Allowing the imagery to fade, breathe with a sense of wonder, as if it were quite amazing to be sitting and breathing and simply aware.
Happy place
1. Imagining being in one of your happy places, one which brings a sense of calm whenever you go there.
2. Allowing the memories and images and feelings of this happy place to enter into your body, heart, and mind.
3. Next focusing on each sense, one at a time, feeling the response in your body and heart as you bring mindfulness to each sense.
a. What are you seeing in this place?
b. What sounds are you hearing in this place?
c. What sensations are you noticing on and in your body in this happy place?
d. What smells are you noticing in this happy place?
4. Bringing attention now to your breath or body or the loving-kindness phrases as you continue to enjoy being in the happy place.
As I will discuss in the next post, while meditation has many benefits including some stress relief, meditation ultimately enables us to develop a deeper understanding of the consequences of our responses to the challenges that life presents. However, these benefits are limited if the mind remains busy and restless during our meditations.